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When someone ignores you...

21 hours ago - 918 views
When someone ignores you...
♥ Hey beauties, how is it going? It's Chunita :)
So yayyy it's Saturday, finally this stressful week is over for me! Anyway, I have to be prepared for the one that is coming cause I have 3 exams... :( But well, I hope everything will be ok!
Anyway... I'm not here to talk about my life haha. I'll make a quick post for you, hope you'll like it :)
 
There might be occasions in your life when your so-called "friends" abruptly cease to talk to you and pretend that you are no longer there. Obviously you feel hurt and disappointed and you want to know why they behave like that. So, HOW CAN YOU CONFRONT THEM?
 

1.Try to figure out why they are avoiding you. Attempt to understand the problem form their point of view.
 
2. If you have no idea why they have suddenly stopped talking to you, ask them nicely. Tell them that you don't understand why they aren't talking to you, and that you would like to work past the problem. If they won't reply to you in person, try sending them a Facebook message, email or text. Don't send all three though - you don't want to grovel, especially when you have no idea what is going on.
You could try calling them on the phone, but be aware that if they ignore you in person, they probably won't pick up the phone for you. With a written message, they will be able to read it without acknowledging you, and will understand that you don't understand the problem.
 
3. Apologize. If you do know the reason that they are mad, make sure you let them know that you are sorry. If you aren't sorry, at least let them know that you understand the issue and that you would like to work things out.
 
4. Make it clear that you are willing to talk about the issue and resolve your friendships when they are.
 
5. Give them space. If they are mad at you, they will not want you to be constantly in their face. Also, most people use the silent treatment to punish someone for something they have done. If you show that you are sorry but not devastated by the silent treatment, it will not last for long.
 
6. After awhile, try to make small talk. Start by saying, "Hi" or, "Hey". If you say it nicely and naturally enough, they may forget that they are supposed to be ignoring you and respond. Play it cool when, and if, they respond - making a big deal out of can prolong the experience.
 
7. Don't send other people to deliver messages. That will make them look bad. It's between you and the other person. No one else.
 
TIPS TO BEAR IN MIND:
 
Don't think about it too much, it can cause stress to you.
 
If they keep ignoring you, do your best to stay away from them and don't spend weeks mourning over them. If they're not your friend, it's their loss.
 
Come to terms with the fact that most friends are expendable. This happens to people who have been lifelong friends all the time; when someone no longer needs you they will show their true colors. If they choose to stop being friends with you when they no longer need your company, then they were never true friends to begin with.
 
Be grateful for everything and everyone you do have, instead of mourning the people you don't have. You will have a new beginning.
 
Try talking them in real life, not over social websites like Facebook and MSN or using texts. You can then judge the sincerity of their words and their body language.
 
If it doesn't work out, just move on, even though it's hard to let go sometimes.
 
Don't get stressed over it; if your friends have walked away from you they're probably not true friends, and so aren't worth being upset about.
 
Give them some time. Maybe something is changing in their life or they're undergoing self-reflection. If they reach out to you later, consider accepting their olive branch to restart your friendship.
 
See you soon girls,
 
♥ Lots of love,
 
Chunita-
4 comments

Supporting a Friend Who Self-harms

22 hours ago - 581 views
Supporting a Friend Who Self-harms
Hey dolls, it's Maggie :)
 
If you are worried that your friend is self-harming, it’s understandable that you would want to be as supportive as you can. However, it’s a lot to take on by yourself, especially if no one else is aware of what’s going on. If you are worried that your friend could be at serious risk of hurting themselves you should tell a teacher, family member, or counselor about your concerns.
 
If your friend tells you that they’re self-harming, it’s important that you encourage them to seek help. Even though they may resist telling other people, it’s important to acknowledge that you aren’t able to help them all on your own. Telling someone like the school counsellor, a teacher, or a parent can be a great way of finding out some helpful and successful strategies to cope with self-harm.
 

Discovering that a friend or relative self-harms can be extremely upsetting. It can be hard to understand why a person would deliberately hurt themselves, and people often go through a range of emotions, like feeling shocked, angry, saddened, confused or guilty.
 
To help you to support the person who self-harms in an understanding and caring way, it will be useful to learn why people self-harm and about some helpful strategies before you offer your support.
 
It is important to take self-harming seriously. A person who self-harms will describe their behaviour as a way of coping with overwhelming feelings associated with difficult or painful experiences. For some it becomes addictive, a way of feeling better and re-establishing control over their emotions. It is rarely used as 'attention seeking', most self-harmers try to keep it a secret and feel very ashamed.
 
Because self-harm is often an expression of something going on for the person internally, ask about how they are feeling, and try to explore what the issues might be. If the person does not feel comfortable talking to you, try to make sure they know you are there to listen if they want to talk, and ensure they know of other places they can go to get support.
 
"Look at the individual, not the harm. Look at the person beyond the scars. Scars are not important. The person that did them is important."
 
It can be very difficult for a person to stop self harming, and it may take them a long time to do so. If the person says they want to stop, discussing ways to gradually reduce the harming can sometimes be helpful. Health professionals call this harm-minimisation, either reducing the severity or frequency of the self harming. The important thing here is that the person will need to find a different way of getting the emotions out.
 
Here are some simple things that you can do to help the self-harmer:
 
- Ask how they are feeling
- Do not be judgmental
- Do not make them feel guilty about the effect it is having on others
- Let the person who self-harms know that you want to listen to them and hear how they are feeling when they feel ready and able to talk.
- When they do discuss it with you be compassionate and respect what the person is telling you, even though you may not understand or find it difficult to accept what they are doing.
- Do not give ultimatums such as 'Every time you self-harm I won't talk to you for a day'. This is not helpful and it won't work.
- Understand that it is a long and hard journey to stop self-harming. Be aware that someone will only stop self-harming when they feel ready and able to do so.
 

Maggie xo
4 comments
Thank You for 1000 Followers!!! :D
Hey girls! So I just realised that we've recently hit 1,000 followers!
 
...WHAT?!?!?!
 
GiRLS THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!
 
Honestly, it's an honour to have such a large number of followers for this account that's only been online for approx. 5 - 6 months. You guys are so lovely and supportive, and we're always going to be here for you girls no matter what! Not only that, but we've also got 40+ girls on the taglist! ASDFGHJKL Can't thank you beautifuls enough!
 
I hope you don't mind, but as the creator of this account, I'd just like to tag my follower Guardian Angels...
 
Maggie @singmesoftlytosleep ~ Half the reason this account worked is because of this girl! Thanks Maggie for helping run this account; it's awesome to see the tips you come up with! And thanks for making the gorgeous icons / showcase; they're all stunning!
 
Nina @shoemama ~ Not only did Nina win a competition of ours, she also got through our little auditions we held a while back! Nina, you write gorgeous songs and tips, so thank you for being so awesome and helpful to the account!
 
Chunita @chunita ~ This amazing girl was also picked after our auditons, and I'd just like to say THANKS for all your brilliant tips and contributions you've made Chunita! You're such a lovely person too, and I can't wait to see what you create next!
 
Also, I should probably add Agata @fashionagata, who was only on here for a short time, but THANKS AGATA for the wonderful tips you made!
 
OKAY ENOUGH THANK YOUS!!
 
Remember gals, we're always here for you, and thank you so much once again (well, that ban from thank yous went well...)
 
WITH LOVE!
Angie on behalf of The Guardian Angels!!
 

___________________________________
 

Hastags:
#1000 #followers #thanks #girls #love #you!!!
5 comments

10 Creative Ways to Stay Positive

Yesterday - 527 views
10 Creative Ways to Stay Positive
Greetings, my lovely Polyvore girls! How's your weekend going / starting / etc. ? :)
 
As you can see, this tip is going to provide you with information on how to stay bright in the mind in ten creative ways. Cue the tip!
 
~ WRiTE ‘EM DOWN: Find a spare jam jar or box and put a load of positive messages and quotes for your future self to read! Or here’s an idea: keep a gratitude journal! Jot down all the things you are thankful for, and that can be anything! Even memories and experiences you are grateful for having.
 
~ SiNG: Why not?! I often hum ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life’ whenever I’m in a frightening situation (insert high ropes course on top of mountain memories here...)
 
~ READ: Read a positive section of a novel to brighten you up or give you encouragement; check out those ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ books. They can sometimes be a bit cheesy, but if you pick a really sweet one while curled up in your bed, you really can’t go wrong.
 
~ VENT: Talk to your friends / family / US! :D Spill out all your problems and lay it out for someone else to help you get a perspective on it. It’s kind of like when you’re not looking in a mirror; someone might be able to see what you can’t. Or if you can’t find someone to talk to, try recording yourself blabbing out all your issues. You shouldn’t hold in everything to yourself.
 
~ TREAT YOURSELF: Sometimes a place to start a positive step is to give yourself a treat. Even if you’re trying to stay positive about not eating an unhealthy food when you’re trying to eat well, instead of eating chocolate, maybe ask for a bit of money to spend on something like a new top or a movie ticket. Making yourself happy one way can be an excellent place to start.
 
~ BRAG: To yourself of course! Or even to someone who doesn’t mind you bragging. I mean, sure we’ve all screwed up a few times (humans tend to have that ability), but we’ve all gotten at least something right before! Even if it’s something as small as reminding yourself all the times you opened the door for your class; every triumph counts!
 
~ SLEEP: Catching some rest will bleep out stress quite easily provided you get there. If you can’t knock yourself out though, try a warm milky drink. Warm milk has been known to send people off to dreamland.
 
~ CHiLL: Go and eat something like chicken soup or a hot drink and relax! Huddle under a blanket like a baby with all your sweaters on and give yourself a cuddle!
 
~ MOTiVATiON: Find out what motivates you and go do it! If it’s retail therapy, go shopping! If it’s nature, head out for a walk. If it’s sport, go to the gym! If it’s religion, pray! This might sound obvious, but getting yourself in a good mood will help you feel a lot brighter.
 
~ GRiN: You’re alive are you not? That’s something worth cracking a smile for, so display those pearly whites of yours, dears!
 
In the end, a positive head will make you a lot happier, and once you understand your situation, you'll be able to know what you're dealing with.
 
Good luck, girls! Keep your light on! :D
Angie xox
 

_____________________________________
 

Hashtags...
#tip #flowers #positive #mind #body #soul #chickensoup #possibility #friends #life #growingup #teen #creative #waysto #ten #head #bright #strong #goodluck #:D
Supporting a Friend With an Eating Disorder
Hey girlies, it's Maggie :)
 
With the increasing levels of eating disorders in teens, there's a good chance that at least one girl in a group of friends will have a friend who is suffering from an eating disorder. If you have a friend who is struggling, you may want to help but you just don't know how.
 
The first thing to keep in mind is that as an "outsider" (not suffering from an Eating Disorder yourself) there are many things you cannot do to help a family member or friend to get better. You cannot force an Anorexic to eat, keep a bulimic from purging, or make a Compulsive Overeater stop overeating. The first thing to realize once you have come to the awareness that your loved-one suffers from an Eating Disorder, is that you must not concentrate immediately on the food. All forms of Eating Disorders are emotionally based and the behaviors are only a symptom to emotional and stress related problems. Disordered eating is an attempt to control, hide, stuff, avoid and forget emotional pain, stress and/or self-hate.
 
Remind yourself that your friend’s eating disorder is not your fault. He or she is suffering from a disease and probably needs medical and psychological help. Do your best to support your friend without blaming him or her. Here are a few tips:
- Tell your friend you're worried about her weight loss or his use of laxatives. Be specific.
- Insist that he or she get professional help and offer to go along to appointments with a doctor, counselor, dietitian or the school nurse.
- Set a positive example with your eating habits and attitudes toward food.
- Try not to gossip about your friend’s appearance.
- Make yourself available to listen to your friend’s fears and problems.
- Smile, laugh and be a source of positive energy.
 
Keep in mind there isn't a lot you can do overall, as an "outsider" to a close family member or friend suffering from an Eating Disorder. It is up to the individual suffering to decide they are ready to deal with the emotional issues in their life that have lead them to their Eating Disorder. They need to make a choice for recovery and to want to do the work to get there. There is no one in their lives that can make this choice for them, they must want to do it for themselves.
 

Maggie xo
6 comments

Feel Good 1O1 - A self-esteem video

Two days ago - 1,364 views
Feel Good 1O1 - A self-esteem video
Hey girlies! It's Maggie :)
 
So I saw this video the other day and wanted to share it with you! It was made by a youtuber called emmablackberry :)
This is a great self-esteem video and I think you all should watch it!
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHGPUzPGI_Y&feature=player_embedded
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHGPUzPGI_Y&feature=player_embedded
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHGPUzPGI_Y&feature=player_embedded
 

Maggie xo
7 comments

Healthy thoughts

Three days ago - 705 views
Healthy thoughts
♥ Hi beauties! It's me, Chunita. How is it going?? I hope very well! :)
So, I'm glad I have some time to be online and why not here in Polyvore! I wanted to post this so badly so here it goes... :)
But before I forget.. I would like to know if my tips are helpful enough for you :) or if there's some special topic you would like to talk about.. Just because I like talking about quite different topics as you may notice.. And so I think it would be really great if most of them are feeling like proccupied or interested in something special and want to deal with it... Anyway, let me know :) (or let the rest of the girls know about it aswell) ♥ .... I feel great that I'm able to help you in some way :) After all, I can notice we experience quite similar circumstances...
 
So, you are maybe wondering what I'm refering to when I talk about HEALTHY THOUGHTS. Let me tell you from my point of view that I'm a VERY pessimistic person, haha REALLY. You know, I'm always expecting the worst to come and I just don't know why... so, it's something that distracts me a lot and I can't find the way to be a little less pessimistic and see things in a different perspective.
Anyway, returning to the previous idea.... When I say "Healthy thoughts" I'm referring to the way how you reflect your outlook on life, your attitude toward yourself, and whether you're optimistic or pessimistic — and it may even affect your health.
 
So, if you think you are a bit pessimistic as me, I think it's a good beginning to change that aspect of your personality. We may can't realize how this can affect our lives and health, daily life, emotions, attitudes, ETC.
Some people are lucky that immediately notice that something is wrong and that they can't achieve a complete harmony with themselves. So this is the key point when they sit down and ask to themselves: "Is this really the way I want to be or not?"
It goes without saying that all these kind of thoughts are in some way related with stress. It comes to a point where we have really A LOT of things to do and we can't even think where to start! I don't know if someone else experiences the same as me but when I'm in those kind of situations, my mind goes blank and the only thing I can think of is about PROBLEMS, FATIGUE and more FATIGUE, and so this is the moment when my pessimist thoughts directly arise.
 
It's time to look at the other side of the box... Pessimism doesn't do anything but affects ourselves...
 
On the other hand, positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach the unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst (as occasionaly may happen to those pessimistic people)
Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head every day. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information.
 
If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking.
 
Comments such as "I’m fat," "I hate my body" or "I’m not good enough" are powerful negative messages that grow your subconscious elephant even bigger. Trying to stop negative thoughts is often harder than you think. The more you try not to think about something, the harder it might be.
Instead of trying to stop damaging thoughts, replace them with positive thoughts. Just as a muscle needs to be exercised to get stronger, your thoughts about food and your body need to be trained. What if each time you heard a negative thought you said to yourself, "I don’t have to be perfect. Nobody's perfect".
 

It's important to include the Healthy benefits that positive thinking may provide... They include:
 
Increased life span
Lower rates of depression
Lower levels of distress
Greater resistance to the common cold
Better psychological and physical well-being
Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress.
 
So, think about all this. Sit down and have a talk with yourself. I'm sure if we become more positive, we will enjoy even more the little details of our lives...It may sound silly but let me tell you that YOU ARE THE OWNER OF YOUR OWN LIFE, SO YOU ARE THE RESPONSIBLE FOR MAKING POSITIVE CHANGES. Remember girls that it is not something that will be achieved as a magic trick...As I said before.... TRY TO BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE THE ONE THAT CAN MAKE THESE CHANGES HAPPEN ♥
 
Hope this was useful for you guys,
Keep strong.
 
♥ Lots of love,
 
Chunita -
 
PS- Don't hesitate about contacting to me whenever you want... I will really appreciate it :)

Your Stories - Bulimia

4 days ago - 909 views
Your Stories - Bulimia
This story was sent in by an anonymous polyvorian.
 
Two years ago I was on the verge of 100 pounds. I began to freak out. When one of my friends had commented on the size of my jeans that she wanted to borrow it set me off. From then on I was bulimic. I ate next to nothing and still threw it all up. I was to afraid of what they boys would say at school. Exactly a years and three months ago i went to a doctors appointment and found out I was 72 pounds and I was 5'2. My mom asked me what was wrong. And I lied and said nothing. My mother and I went to a Chinese buffet which had always been my favorite food. And when I only asked for a cup of crunchy noodles my mom knew what I was doing. But I didn't want to stop. I was convinced I wasn't skinny enough. But I ate a few servings more of food. But threw up more. Two months ago I realized I was 100 pounds and 5'5. I told my mother and she was proud. But I wasn't. Currently I am 93 pounds 5'5. I have a tube that feeds me food and I take over 5 different pills each night. I'm still throwing up but it is not my choice. It's because my stomach can not digest right, so everything has to come from my mouth. Bulimia is not fun.
 

If you would like to share your own story, just send it to us in a PM!
Or if you ever just want to talk, we're here for you and will never disclose anything we hear, this is a 1OO% confidential and judgement-free zone!
 
- The Guardian Angels
4 comments

Coping With Anxiety Part Two

5 days ago - 1,561 views
Coping With Anxiety Part Two
Hey dolls, it's Maggie :)
 

~ CHALLENGE NEGATiVE THOUGHTS ~
 
Social anxiety sufferers have negative thoughts and beliefs that contribute to their anxiety. If you have social anxiety disorder, or social phobia, you may find yourself overwhelmed by thoughts like:
 
“I know I’ll end up looking like a fool.”
 
“My voice will start shaking and I’ll humiliate myself.”
 
“People will think I’m stupid.”
 
“I won’t have anything to say. I’ll seem boring.”
 
Challenging these negative thoughts, either through therapy or on your own, is one effective way to reduce the symptoms of social anxiety disorder. The first step is to identify the automatic negative thoughts that underlie your fear of social situations. For example, if you‘re worried about an upcoming work presentation, the underlying negative thought might be: “I’m going to blow it. Everyone will think I’m completely incompetent.”The next step is to analyze and challenge them. It helps to ask yourself questions about the negative thoughts: “Do I know for sure that I’m going to blow the presentation?” or “Even if I’m nervous, will people necessarily think I’m incompetent?” Through this logical evaluation of your negative thoughts, you can gradually replace them with more realistic and positive ways of looking at social situations that trigger your anxiety.
 

~ LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR BREATH ~
 
Many changes happen in your body when you become anxious. One of the first changes is that you begin to breathe quickly. Overbreathing throws off the balance of oxygen and carbon dioxide in your body—leading to more physical symptoms of anxiety, such as dizziness, a feeling of suffocation, increased heart rate, and muscle tension. Learning to slow your breathing down can help you bring your physical symptoms of anxiety back under control.
 

~ FACE YOUR FEARS ~
 
One of the most helpful things you can do to overcome social anxiety disorder, or social phobia, is to face the social situations you fear rather than avoid them. Avoidance keeps social anxiety disorder going. While avoiding nerve-wracking situations may help you feel better in the short term, it prevents you from becoming more comfortable in social situations and learning how to cope. In fact, the more you avoid a feared social situation, the more frightening it becomes. Avoidance may also prevent you from doing things you’d like to do or reaching certain goals. For example, a fear of speaking up may prevent you from sharing your ideas at work, standing out in the classroom, or making new friends.
 
Challenging social anxiety one step at a time
 
While it may seem impossible to overcome a feared social situation, you can do it by taking it one small step at a time. The key is to start with a situation that you can handle and gradually work your way up to more challenging situations, building your confidence and coping skills as you move up the “anxiety ladder.”For example, if socializing with strangers makes you anxious, you might start by accompanying an outgoing friend to a party. Once you’re comfortable with that step, you might try introducing yourself to one new person, and so on.
 

~ BUiLD BETTER RELATiONSHiPS ~
 
Actively seeking out and joining supportive social environments is another effective way of tackling and overcoming social anxiety disorder or social phobia. Take a social skills class or an assertiveness training class. These classes are often offered at local adult education centers or community colleges.Volunteer doing something you enjoy, such as walking dogs in a shelter, or stuffing envelopes for a campaign — anything that will give you an activity to focus on while you are also engaging with a small number of like-minded people. Work on your communication skills. Good relationships depend on clear, emotionally-intelligent communication. If you find that you have trouble connecting to others, learning the basic skills of emotional intelligence can help.
 

~ CHANGE YOUR LiFESTYLE ~
 
While lifestyle changes alone aren’t enough to overcome social phobia or social anxiety disorder, they can support your overall treatment progress. The following lifestyle tips will help you reduce your overall anxiety levels and set the stage for successful treatment:
 
Avoid or limit caffeine. Coffee, tea, caffeinated soda, energy drinks, and chocolate act as stimulants that increase anxiety symptoms.
Drink only in moderation. You may be tempted to drink before a party or other social situation in order to calm your nerves, but alcohol increases your risk of having an anxiety attack.
Quit smoking. Nicotine is a powerful stimulant. Smoking leads to higher, not lower, levels of anxiety.
Get adequate sleep. When you’re sleep deprived, you’re more vulnerable to anxiety. Being well rested will help you stay calm in social situations.
 
source: psyche-quotes
 

Maggie xo
4 comments

Coping With Anxiety Part One

5 days ago - 1,253 views
Coping With Anxiety Part One
Hey girlies, it's Maggie :)
 

&&TAKE DEEP BREATHS
 
One of the most basic ways to combat anxiety is through breathing exercises. Convince yourself to lie down and focus on taking deep breaths, one after another. Usually, your body will follow suit and calm itself down. If it doesn't work right away, be patient; sometimes it can take a while for your body to realize nothing is wrong.
 

&&FOCUS YOUR ENERGY
 
Part of the problem with anxiety is that it can continue to worsen the longer you focus on your symptoms. Instead, try to focus your energy on some type of activity so that you can forget about the issue at hand.
 
Try doing some work around the house, or work on a puzzle. Reorganize your closet, or play a new video game. Anything that gets you up and around or occupies your thoughts should help alleviate your anxiety.
 
For some people, exercise is a good option. Keep in mind, though, that exercise will increase your heart rate; if you are already concerned about your racing heart beforehand, you may want to try a different approach so as to not push yourself further into your attack.
 

&&DiSTRACT YOURSELF
 
Along the same lines as focusing your energy, do something to distract yourself from the situation at hand! Watch a funny TV show or read an interesting book. Try to develop a daydream about something happy that you would like to experience in your life. The more you can distract yourself from how you are feeling, the more likely it is that the feeling will drift away!
 

&&BE AROUND PEOPLE
 
Sometimes the one thing you need when having an anxiety attack is to feel connected to another human being. If you live alone, this can be difficult to arrange. At the very least, try calling a friend. The sound of their voice may be enough to calm you down; try explaining your feelings to them to get it all off your chest. Saying it out loud might help you realize that the situation isn't so dire!
 
If speaking to someone isn't enough, invite them to come over and stay with you until you calm down! The feeling of being physically alone can sometimes be the root cause of an attack, and having someone nearby can send that fear away.
 
As a last resort, get dressed and go visit a public place. Head to the local 24 hour grocery store and do some late night shopping. If it's daytime, visit a local park and people watch.
 

&&LiSTEN TO MUSiC
 
If you're trying to take deep breaths and calm down but it isn't really working, try adding some relaxing music to the mix! Put on something soothing like Enya or Norah Jones to help soften the mood. If music is too stimulating, try using a sound machine! The sound of rain on the rooftop or the waves on a beach might be just what the doctor ordered!
 

&&TURN ON A LiGHT
 
Occasionally, darkness can add to the tension that heightens an anxiety attack. Nighttime is often the worst time of day for someone who is prone to feeling anxious, and just being in the dark can worsen the symptoms. If that's the case for you, turn on a light!
 
Even as an adult, a night light can be exactly what you need to relax. Don't let anyone make you feel silly for needing one; you have to do what works for you! Using a night light is better than having an anxiety attack any day of the week.
 

&&ViSiT A DOCTOR
 
If your anxiety symptoms really have you worried, it can really help to talk to a doctor about what you're feeling! Finding out for sure that you don't have a heart problem or another serious health issue can go a long way to put your mind at ease. When you know for a fact that your racing heart and chest pains are all in your head, it can be a lot easier to ignore it and move on!
 

&&CUT DOWN ON STRESS
 
This one is kind of a given, and it's probably the last piece of advice you wanted to see on this list. If you could cut down on your stress, you probably would've done it already! But on the off chance that something is stressing you out that you can push out of your life, you'll be that much closer to being calm on a regular basis.
 

&&DON'T LOOK UP YOUR SYMPTOMS ONLiNE
 
I can't stress this last one enough: Never, ever, ever look up your symptoms online. Like I said before, see an actual doctor in person if you are truly worried about your symptoms. The only thing that can possibly come from searching for information online is increased worry. You'll find out about all sorts of possible diseases that you don't have, and you'll be pushed further into the tunnel of anxiety. Don't let that happen to you! Avoid those sites at all costs.
 

&&COPiNG STATEMENTS
 
We can stop thoughts that lead to anxiety by consciously replacing them by more rational thoughts like the following:
 
~ When Anxiety is Near ~
 
1. I’m going to be all right. My feelings are not always rational. I’m just going to relax, calm down, and everything will be all right.
 
2. Anxiety is not dangerous — it’s just uncomfortable. I am fine; I’ll just continue with what I’m doing or find something more active to do.
 
3. Right now I have some feelings I don’t like. They are really just phantoms, however, because they are disappearing. I will be fine.
 
4. Right now I have feelings I don’t like. They will be over with soon and I’ll be fine. For now, I am going to focus on doing something else around me.
 
5. That picture (image) in my head is not a healthy or rational picture. Instead, I’m going to focus on something healthy like _________________________.
 
6. I’ve stopped my negative thoughts before and I’m going to do it again now. I am becoming better and better at deflecting these automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) and that makes me happy.
 
7. So I feel a little anxiety now, SO WHAT? It’s not like it’s the first time. I am going to take some nice deep breaths and keep on going. This will help me continue to get better.”
 
~ When Preparing for a Stressful Situation ~
 
1. I’ve done this before so I know I can do it again.
 
2. When this is over, I’ll be glad that I did it.
 
3. The feeling I have about this trip doesn’t make much sense. This anxiety is like a mirage in the desert. I’ll just continue to “walk” forward until I pass right through it.
 
4. This may seem hard now, but it will become easier and easier over time.
 
5. I think I have more control over these thoughts and feelings than I once imagined. I am very gently going to turn away from my old feelings and move in a new, betterdirection.
 
~ When Feeling Overwhelmed ~
 
1. I can be anxious and still focus on the task at hand. As I focus on the task, my anxiety will go down.
 
2. Anxiety is a old habit pattern that my body responds to. I am going to calmly and nicely change this old habit. I feel a little bit of peace, despite my anxiety, and this peace is going to grow and grow. As my peace and security grow, then anxiety and panic will have to shrink.
 
3. At first, my anxiety was powerful and scary, but as time goes by it doesn’t have the hold on me that I once thought it had. I am moving forward gently and nicely all the time.
 
4. I don’t need to fight my feelings. I realize that these feelings won’t be allowed to stay around very much longer. I just accept my new feelings of peace, contentment, security, and confidence.
 
5. All these things that are happening to me seem overwhelming. But I’ve caught myself this time and I refuse to focus on these things. Instead, I’m going to talk slowly to myself, focus away from my problem, and continue with what I have to do. In this way, my anxiety will have to shrink away and disappear.
 

 
~~ EXTRA TiPS ~~
 
1. Remember, feelings of panic are just exaggerations of normal bodily stress reactions.
 
2. Sensations are neither harmful nor dangerous - just unpleasant. Nothing worse will happen.
 
3. Stop adding to the panic with frightening thoughts of where panic will lead.
 
4. Stay in the present. Be aware of what is happening to you rather than concern yourself with how much worse it might get.
 
5. Wait and give the fear time to pass.
 
6. Notice that when you stop adding to panic with frightening thoughts, the fear begins to fade.
7. Focus on coping with facing the fear rather than trying to avoid it or escape from it.
 
8. Look around you. Plan what you will do next as the panic subsides.
 
9. Think about the progress made so far, despite all the difficulties.
 
10. When you are ready to go on, do so in an easy, relaxed manner. There is no hurry.
 
11. Check your nutrition. Sometimes high levels of anxiety are caused by a magnesium or potassium deficiency.
 
12. Pay attention to your caffeine levels. Coffee, tea and chocolate all contain reasonable levels of caffeine. This can make you jittery, or increase your feelings of anxiety.
 
13. Try meditation and mindfulness. These help to keep you focused on the here and now, to slow your heartbeat and breathing down, as well as helping to relax your mind.
 
14. Work on maintain a healthy self-esteem. Many people who feel anxious, stressed or depressed are actually suffering from low self-esteem.
 
15. Find a trusted sounding board, and vent your feelings to them – but make sure it’s someone who understands and cares.
 
16. Exercise – This releases endorphins, those feel-good hormones, which help reduce our feelings of anxiety.
 
17. Distract yourself. Take your mind off your worries by doing other things that require concentration, and a focused state of mind.
 
18. Treat yourself. Give yourself a mood lifter by hanging out with friends, buying something that you love, or doing something that is fun.
 

Maggie xo
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